Lauren Spencer Smith has always been aware of the Christmas dichotomy. Growing up in Canada, she became entranced by midwinter, by the time spent with loved ones.
Yet she also knows it can be a tough time of year. Forever honest with her fans, Lauren Spencer Smith has spoken about growing up with divorced parents, and how Christmas can conjure up some mixed emotions for many people.
This year, at least, she has every reason to celebrate. 2023 saw the release of Lauren Spencer Smith’s album ‘Mirror’, a bona fide breakout moment for this wonderful talent.
Since then, she’s returned to the UK – where she born, fact fans – for a huge tour, including two sold out nights at London’s O2 Forum Kentish Town. She’s also continued her ad hoc Christmas tradition by releasing two new songs – the original ‘Broke Christmas’ and a cute take on the evergreen ‘Santa Baby’.
Writing for Clash, Lauren Spencer Smith discusses her mixed feelings on the festive season – and offers some comfort to fans who feel the same.
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Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year… Sometimes.
It’s always important to be grateful for the things you have, but equally as important to accept that it looks different for every family and individual. I’ve always taken the path of wanting to be completely honest and transparent about my life with all of you, so naturally, being open about my experience of the holidays is something I feel really passionate about. I want to create a space for people to feel validated, comforted and not alone with their emotions.
The holidays can feel so fun, so happy, and genuinely joyful. But it can also feel overwhelming, stressful and triggering. Christmas doesn’t always look like the movies, and that is okay.
I grew up with divorced parents and not a lot of money, so Christmas often felt like a burden. December 1st seemed to arrive quicker and quicker each year and I’d immediately start questioning “which house am I spending Christmas at this year? How will I not offend the other parent?” etc.
We live in an age of comparison. It’s so easy to compare your life to someone else’s, especially at Christmas time, and it’s only heightened by social media. Feeling upset because other kids get more than you isn’t being ungrateful, it’s being a normal human being who is grappling with the complex feelings and emotions that come with the season. It’s normal to feel stressed about buying presents, or preparing a perfect dinner or being nervous to see that family member who isn’t quite your favourite, or feeling like the holidays are completely unenjoyable because you’ve lost a loved one. These are real life situations, and real life struggles, that sadly don’t disappear just because it’s December 25th.
The older I become the more I continue to learn how to cope with my emotions surrounding the holidays. Through therapy and a lot of time, I’ve learned that Christmas isn’t about the presents and feeling “Christmas joy”, but instead about taking time to be grateful for the things I do have. For me, I’m feeling thankful for a healthy body, beautiful clean air to breathe and the opportunity to share my music with the world.
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Growing up, I always felt that there wasn’t enough sad or even relatable holiday music. It’s the tough feeling to hear up-tempo super-jolly Christmas music when you feel like your life is the opposite, leaving you feeling alone and questioning why doesn’t it feel like the happiest season of all? Last year I released a song called ‘Single On The 25th’ – a song about being single and alone at the holidays. And this year I channeled my feelings through a bit of humour and released ‘Broke Christmas’ which is all about not having financial stability during the holidays because you’ve spent all your money throughout the year and now can’t afford presents. I have so much Christmas music and intend to continue to release more each holiday season to help fill this space and hopefully help you all feel less alone.
You can feel grateful and sad all at the same time. Don’t feel pressured to feel the holiday joy just because you think you “have to”. Life is a journey and we are all on our own path. So If this Christmas you feel like watching Netflix in your pyjamas instead of feeling the holiday joy, that is completely okay.
It’s easy to find the things we don’t enjoy about Christmas and lose sight of what really matters. You exist. The world and so many people’s lives are a better place because you are in it. The new year is right around the corner and it’s okay to feel like we’re barely scraping by December this year.
This is a reminder to check in on your friends and family around the holidays. It’s not as perfect as we see in the movies and not everyone is as put together as they seem on the outside.
I love you all and I hope your holiday is peaceful, comforting, and most of all I hope you feel validated and understand that Christmas looks different for us all.
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