It’s that time of the year again when music breaks out of its ghetto for two full hours on prime time television. What should be a good thing is however tainted by the fact that it’ll be bland pop star after bland pop star thanking their record label with Robbie being wacky in the finale (he’s up for the ‘Outstanding Contribution Award’. Contribution to what?)
British Female Solo Artist
Bat for Lashes
Florence & the Machine
Leona Lewis
Lily Allen
Pixie Lott
Ignoring the stage school brat and the dullest woman in music, we have Bat For Lashes, Florence and Lily. Not a bad showing but Lily gets it for actually having opinions and fearlessly sharing them with us.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Lily Allen
British Male Solo Artist
Calvin Harris
Dizzee Rascal
Mika
Paolo Nutini
Robbie Williams
Now, Paolo might seem like a strange choice but just look at the others. Jesus! Paolo on the other hand seems like a nice bloke, likes a smoke and his jaunty ‘Pencil Full Of Lead’ tune makes me smile.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Paolo Nutini
British Breakthrough Act
Florence & the Machine
Friendly Fires
JLS
La Roux
Pixie Lott
Flo has dominated in the last year but Friendly Fires are a favourite of mine so, despite having an album out in 2008, they are my choice for this year’s ‘breakthrough’ act.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Friendly Fires
British Group
Doves
Friendly Fires
JLS
Kasabian
Muse
Surprisingly decent category, except for JLS’s bizzare appearance which probably means they’re going to win. As much as I love Doves, I think I’ll have to go with Friendly Fires to give them a wee leg up.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Friendly Fires
MasterCard British Album
Dizzee Rascal – Tongue n’Cheek
Florence & the Machine – Lungs
Kasabian – West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum
Lily Allen – It’s Not Me, It’s You
Paolo Nutini – Sunny Side Up
All hail Kasabian’s proper rock lunacy. Now moving into concept albums, daft covers and all. Yep, though their boorish proclaiming sticks in my craw I’m gonna go with the men who saved dance music (read THAT classic interview HERE).
ClashMusic’s Choice : Kasabian – West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum
British Single
Alesha Dixon – Breathe Slow
Alexandra Burke Ft Flo Rida – Bad Boys
Cheryl Cole – Fight For This Love
Joe McElderry – The Climb
JLS – Beat Again
La Roux – In For The Kill
Lily Allen – The Fear
Pixie Lott – Mama Do
Taio Cruz – Break Your Heart
Tinchy Stryder Ft N-Dubz – Number 1
Oh, now I’m getting out of my depth. I haven’t even heard of most of these and those that I have heard I hate. Except Lily and La Roux, who I don’t mind. Mhh, gonna have to go with La Roux for the Skream remix of ‘In For The Kill’. Well, if La Roux hadn’t recorded it, he couldn’t have remixed it.
ClashMusic’s Choice : La Roux – In For The Kill
Critics’ Choice
Ellie Goulding
Delphic
Marina and the Diamonds
I’m a critic and I wouldn’t have chose any of these three. Oh well. Putting on my critic’s hat, Marina sound like she’s not quite right, Ellie already has the BBC’s vote so it’s Delphic for me.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Delphic
BRITs Album of 30 Years
Coldplay – A Rush of Blood to the Head
Dido – No Angel
Dire Straits – Brothers in Arms
Duffy – Rockferry
Keane – Hopes & Fears
Oasis – (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?
Phil Collins – No Jacket Required
Sade – Diamond Life
The Verve – Urban Hymns
Travis – The Man Who
To celebrate 30 BRIT awards we get to choose an album from the last 30 years. I actually laughed out loud (I refuse to type ‘LOL’) at the inclusion of ‘No Jacket Required’ and other, so very, very BRITs albums. And these are the best albums of the last 30 years? Yet no Stone Roses, The Smiths or Massive Attack? I could go on but hey, it’s the BRITs and it’s their ball we’re playing with. For me it’s a toss up between Oasis and The Verve with Oasis nudging it as ‘Urban Hymns’ isn’t the best Verve long player (in fact either of their 2 previous albums would swing it their way).
ClashMusic’s Choice : Oasis – (What’s the Story) Morning Glory?
The BRITs Hits 30
Bee Gees – Stayin’ Alive/How Deep is Your Love
Bros. – I Owe you Nothing
Coldplay – Clocks
Eurythmics & Stevie Wonder – Angel
Girls Aloud – The Promise
Kanye West – Gold Digger
Kylie Minogue – Can’t Get You Out of my Head
Michael Jackson – Earth Song
Paul McCartney – Live & Let Die
Pet Shop Boys – Go West
Robbie Williams & Tom Jones – The Full Monty Medley
Scissor Sisters – Take Your Mama
Spice Girls – Wannabe/Who Do You Think You Are
Take That – Beatles Medley
The Who – Who Are You
More back slapping with an award for the best live performance at the BRITS over the past 30 years. Of course it has to be Michael Jackson’s ‘Earth Song’. Yep, you know why… Jarvis’ stage invasion. Mind you, that’s probably considered bad form though now Jackson has risen to saintlike status following his death (and no kiddy fiddling jokes either please).
ClashMusic’s Choice : Michael Jackson – Earth Song
International Female Solo Artist
Lady Gaga
Ladyhawke
Norah Jones
Rihanna
Shakira
You know the only thing Ladyhawke released in 2009 was ‘Magic’, which was taken from her album released in 2008? Wasn’t there enough music created by females last year? Internationally? This is another category I’ve no real interest in but will go with Shakira for her daft, half-hearted howl on her ‘She Wolf’ track.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Shakira
International Male Solo Artist
Bruce Springsteen
Eminem
Jay-Z
Michael Buble
Seasick Steve
Despite having him on the cover, I do love the underdog so it’s Seasick Steve for me. And I’m sure Jay-Z can console himself in his diamond palace, on his bed made of solid gold… with Beyonce by his side. Yep, he’ll get over it.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Seasick Steve
International Album
Animal Collective – Merriweather Post Pavilion
Black Eyed Peas – The End
Empire of the Sun – Walking on a Dream
Jay-Z – The Blueprint 3
Lady Gaga – The Fame
Might they actually win it? Probably not but, in keeping with it being our Album of the Year last Year, it’s Animal Collective’s ‘Merriweather Post Pavilion’ for me. Good to see the loopy Empire of the Sun album in there too, that’d almost be an acceptable winner too if they turned up in costume.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Animal Collective – Merriweather Post Pavilion
International Breakthrough Act
Animal Collective
Daniel Merriweather
Empire of the Sun
Lady Gaga
Taylor Swift
Lady Gaga may well sweep the board, and yeah I do prefer her twisted take on manufactured pop to the Brits School pop pap any day of the week, but again for me it’s the Animal Collective boys. Hopefully they’ll show the album cover alot and freak loads of people out.
ClashMusic’s Choice : Animal Collective
Outstanding Contribution Award
Robbie Williams
Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha Ha ha ha ha ha FUCK OFF!
ClashMusic’s Choice: I need a drink…
