Top Ten - Credit Crunk

The wealthiest person is a pauper at times
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In Lehmans terms (get it!?) the economic downfall will have repurcussions on everyone, from students to teachers, businessmen to babies and deceased to living.


Even those without house and car will still have a small, private weep about increasing bread prices. We now have alot of worries on our hands. You need to drive more economically, watch your carbon footprint, recycle your rotting vegetables, eat healthily, avoid cancer and switch the light off to save energy. Not only do you not have time to read this article, you can't. You switched the computer off. Not all is lost, here are ten consoling songs just for you:

You need to drive more economically, watch your carbon footprint

10. Hard Fi - Cash Machine

This was the first single for the now seasoned rockers of Staines. The video shows the band greased up, working away inside a cash point as if it were a coal mine. It is nerve wracking enough trying to withdraw money in the present climate, without the possibility of a miniature, oiled Richard Archer squeezing through the cash slot and snapping at your fingers.

9. Notorious BIG - Mo Money, Mo Problems

Even the most adamant rap critics have had their hips hopped at one time by legendary musician, Notorious B.I.G. Mr BIG hit success with this cunning insight into the hyper inflation, especially the consequences of the wall street crash on 1920's German economy... Wasnt it? "Like thizat, dangerous, on trizack, leave your ass blizzack", Any efficient businessman can see the hidden messages there. Ahem.

8. Flight Of The Conchords - Inner City Pressure

The 'leap over the pond' often referred to musicians, actors and comedians from America or Britain, testing their talents in opposing cultures. However, it is the abundance of Oceanic talent these days that has seen the Indian Ocean become the new 'leap'. This synth-a-holic New Zealand comedy duo offer a humorous view of making your living during hard times. "You know your not in high finance. Considering second hand underpants". A lyric written for constructive reflection.

7. Chemical Brothers - Hold Tight London

At times of global recession it is the capital cities that feel the real heat. Trying to build an olympic village during a property crash will probably be more boggling than a rubiks triangle. This tight big beat number goes out to the southerners. Its an excellent reminder of exactly how far the Chemical Brothers have come. From big beat to trip hop and some massive electronica-pop hits, nobody can accuse Chemical Brothers of not mixing it up, literally and idealistically.

6. Beatles - Oh Darling

"Oh Darling!" Shout the British icons. Oh Darling indeed Alistair... Your eyebrows are the only remotely inspiring thing left in the British economy.

5. Futureheads - Worry About It Later

This song deserved more credit than the 'flop' it was labelled. These 'Mackem' rockers are purveryors of 'sticking it to the man' after quitting their record label, following this release, to start their own personal brand. 'Worry about it later!' cries out Barry Hyde. Probably the least advised but most likely thought running through many heads during global recession. Ignorance is bliss.

...the best whistlers in Stockholm

4. Klaxons - Its not over yet

Just to reiterate some reality, before any of you get your hopes up. New Rave is actually economic propaganda. Many have noticed the demise of the sterling 'coincidentally' clash with the inital rise of rave and its re-birth. This is so true its not even a conspiracy theory. Its just a conspiracy. In fact it is rumoured that the next Justice EP will be called 'Ten Ways You Could Drive More Economically Whilst Petrol Prices Are So High'. French techno is so hot right now!

3. Peter, Bjorn & John - Young Folks

I've noticed this top ten has taken a somewhat downbeat vibe. So instead of throwing in Madonna's 'This Used to Be My Playground' and letting you guys finish yourselves off. I am choosing to avoid indirect manslaughter charges and cheer it up with the best whistlers in Stockholm, Peter Bjorn and John. If there is anything good about the recession, its that you 'Young Folks' have an ideal opportunity to get on the housing market. Buy, you fools!

2. The Enemy - Away From Here

Almost every lyric of this song could be an inspiring consolation to any made redundant due to the recession. "Promotions aint my thing, name badges are not interesting". However, the fact that Richard & Judy have called a break to their series might be too heavy a disappointment to bear for many of the unemployed.

1. Jeff Buckley - Satisfied Mind

"Money can’t buy back all your youth when you’re old, a friend when you’re lonely, or peace to your soul. The wealthiest person, is a pauper at times compared to the man with a satisfied mind”. Amen Jeff Buckley. Take heed capitalists!

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